It is good.

I’ve had trouble writing the past few days. I’ve wanted to write but have felt silly writing what I feel are the same ridiculously happy ramblings over and over again. …these are my favorite things today…and this is truly my happy place…I mean it almost feels phony. The thing is though, it’s not. The past few weeks have been simply what I have written them to be…not forced, not stressed, not without frustration or anger…but simply happy, joyful.

As I was walking our four dogs yesterday I thought to myself how ridiculous I must look. (Side note: I think this every day when I walk our dogs because there are four of them. Two extra large. One small. One extra small. We’re kind of like your everyday circus.) I could see our shadows in front of me: (from left to right) thick chain, big oval head, skinny ribbon of a leash, tiny bobble head, big me shadow, small chain, small fluffy poof-ball head, and big chain, another big oval head. I would have taken a picture for you had I not known that I would have gotten tangled in the process. 

As we headed up a hill, a duck in the field to our far left let out a very loud laugh. Not a quack…alright, well…it was a quack. But this quack sounded like a laugh. The duck was laughing at us. As it rightfully should have.

It’s comical. My life. Life in general. 

We live in a broken world. A very broken world. I study it every day in school. I can flip on my tv and within seconds hear about it. I can hop on the world wide web and be overwhelmed by it. I can even sit in silence in my room alone and be painfully aware of it’s presence. 

It’s always present, hovering in the air. Sometimes it is like too-bright headlights blaring in your eyes, enticing your eyes to stare despite your best attempts not to. Sometimes it’s as sneaky as a fox, silent until it suddenly springs to life to take you down.

While I am in school I think I allow this to become too much of a focus. Fine. Often…anytime…I allow this to become too much of my focus. 

Don’t we all sometimes?

The laundry has piled up. Must mean we are all worthless. Someone is late. Again. Must mean they don’t respect you. Your boss gave someone else a promotion. Must mean he doesn’t like you. The person you love doesn’t do things exactly as you would like them to. Must mean their a complete imbecile and the world is coming to an end.

Too much focus on the brokenness. The not good.

Despite all of that, this past month has been a reprieve from the broken. Not because it has disappeared or lessened to any measure, but simply because I have been blessed with a clearer mind, a warmer heart, and a more passionate hope and will to live fully. 

To be honest, I think this is how it is meant to be. 

The focus is not to be on the bad, the negative, the things we can/can’t control that drive us mad. The focus is on a Savior who rescued. Life that was given eternally. Peace. 

I think that is what true love does…it inspires. It helps you see more clearly. It removes the oily stains, dusts off the grime, and helps you to see the beauty. True love is what I have. 

True love of a Father that is the ultimate beauty maker, see-er, and lover.

True love of one guy I just can’t seem to get enough of.

In approximately one whole day, reality comes bursting back through the door. Productivity has already made it’s return. I have already spent two days back with the kiddos. 

Reality.

Reality is…

It is good.