escape artist: how escaping everyday will change your life

“There
will always be good things vying for your attention, but choose
wisely. Only the great things are deserving of it.”

I
think this came from my brain. If it didn’t and I owe someone credit,
I apologize. I found this today as I was scrolling through the notes
on my phone looking for something that I didn’t need nearly as much
as this.

This
past Saturday I had the rare opportunity to take a yoga class with
one of my yoga heroes. She is absolutely divine and has been pure
light on this yoga journey of mine. 

She
is one of those bizarre social media connections that I would
essentially call her a friend because of what she chooses to share
with the world & how ::ahem:: diligently I follow her, but she
has no idea who I am. [Totally normal and not weird at all, y’all.]

So
she was here in Atlanta and I got to go!

For
ninety minutes I was in blissed out heaven as Rachel Brathen led me
{and just 200 other yogis} through a practice on our mats.

[And
let me tell you my most favorite part of events like these and then
I’ll get to the point: There is no such thing as a yogi body.
The real yoga bodies out there come in every shape and size that God
has created on the face of this planet. There are lean, sculpted yogi
bodies. There are squishy, round yogi bodies. There are soft and
strong yogi bodies. There are curvy yogi bodies. There are athletic
yogi bodies. There are big and small and everything in between yogi
bodies and it was the most beautiful sea of spandex I have ever seen.
If you believe anything other than this to be true about your yoga
body. Hear me roar: it is false. Now…where was I?]

It
was awesome! It was beyond amazing. I laughed and I {almost} cried. I
sweat {part of my literal} butt off I am sure! I am confident I
smiled the entire way through.

But
there was one problem, I was distracted. 

The
mind that I have (for years) trained so carefully to escape the hard
things in life, to turn around and run when discomfort was running
towards me, that mind was no different of a mind in the presence of
someone that I consider hugely deserving of my full attention.

Here’s
the problem with distraction and escaping that you won’t learn until
you’re a well trained escape artist:

When
you train yourself to escape from the negative emotions, you are
training yourself to escape from the positive ones as well.

Brené
Brown says it this way:

“you
cannot selectively numb emotion. You can’t say, here’s the bad
stuff. Here’s vulnerability, here’s grief, here’s shame, here’s
fear, here’s disappointment. I don’t want to feel these. I’m
going to have a couple of beers and a banana nut muffin…You can’t
numb those hard feelings without numbing the other affects…So
when we numb those, we numb joy, we numb gratitude, we
numb happiness.”

We
cannot selectively distract and escape.

I
had set one purpose in this moment: to be fully present and celebrate
this time with RB.

And
it was challenging.

Meditation
has taught me that throughout the day I spend most of my brain power
rehearsing & planning. Rehearsing & planning. Rehearsing &
planning.

Usually
rehearsing for conversations that never end up happening &
planning for things that I are quickly resolved when I sit down with
intention and focus.

It’s
exhausting. And absolutely no fun.

Do
you know the most common response I get to the statement, “I am
a yoga therapist” {second only to, “ooooh
that’s so interesting”}?

“Oh,
I can’t do yoga.”

Usually
they eventually tell me they have tried and that it was hard.
So what they essentially tell me is, “Oh, I don’t do
yoga” by choice. because it’s hard.

Staying
present. Leaning into discomfort. It’s freaking uncomfortable,
people.

Because
it’s vulnerable. It sits us eyeball-to-eyeball with our own broken
humanity, which we spend 99% of our time trying to forget. 

We
are human. Life is fragile. People are dying. People are dying for
lies. People are dying because of hate. People of dying because
they’re lives are entrapped in a solid wall of painful bull shit that
life dealt them some time ago and they haven’t yet been able to work
through it to live life abundantly. 

We
are on our way to death. 

“Gosh,
Emily, that’s morbid.”

Is
it? Is it really? 

Because
it really just seems like a fact. A factual invitation to show
up and live life. 

To
be present. If death is coming for us, whether tomorrow or 85 years
from now, would you prefer to live your moments exhausting them in a
black hole vortex of mindless chatter or would you rather exhaust
them on the beautifully discomforting vulnerable gift of being
present?

So
I have an invitation for you: 

begin being more present.

When
you’re with your friends, be
with your friends. Put your phone away. Trust that your internet
friends aren’t going to have too much fun without you. {fyi: they’re
always having life without you—good or bad—I know, don’t think
about it too much.}

When
you wake up in the morning sit up in bed for five minutes and focus
on your breath. That’s it. Just focus on your breath, the rise and
fall of your chest, where you feel the air. Five minutes.

You
won’t like it at first. I’m telling you now so you won’t get mad
later.

But
the payoff…is sure to not dissapoint.

In
summary, in the ever wise words of a twelve year old I know &
love:

“Yesterday
is history.

Tomorrow is a mystery.

So be present today because it’s a
present.

So yeah.”