Lessons (February 14, 2011 Pt. 2) and Leo*

16 Feb Lessons (February 14, 2011 Pt. 2) and Leo*

Yesterday I heard a man talk about his life. His story was one that could stir any heart. In an embarrassingly short summary the highlights focused on go like this: After being in a motorcycle accident twenty years(ish) ago with a brain injury that threatened his life…he lived. He lived a (normal) life until a few years ago when he was diagnosed with neck and throat cancer. That he survived as well…it was by no means an easy task to do, but he survived. For a while he lost ability to do most anything…or the will. He said at one point that “[I] could have died several times. The body was just there [weak enough]…but my Spirit would not let me. It said keep going.” While going through treatment he received a brochure for a motorcycle trip around the globe. This was one of the major things that helped him get through the rest of treatment. He and his wife would go on this trip via motorcycle around the world. How incredible is that!!? And now…the reason I had the blessing of hearing his story is because he was in an accident on his trip…Leo broke his leg. His wife is currently in S. America without him, while he is here healing…once again.

He was asked to speak with us because we are studying existentialism. What better example of this than a man in this position…who teared up when he talked about his cancer…to declare, “I’m a survivor.”

Simple as that…He’s a survivor.

This man blessed a multitude of hearts yesterday. I recognize that each has his or her own set of ‘issues’ and hard life circumstances, but can you imagine facing the big things this man has with the simple truth that “I’m a survivor.” …?

All of this to say that a lot of life, the circumstances, the consequences, the outcomes, the risks we take, the lives we live have a lot to do with…how we live and how we choose to interpret the circumstances in our lives. This leads me to the next two lessons God had in store for me on Monday…

Lesson #2: God answers prayers better than we do.

For a few long weeks now my soul has been troubled. The problem is I could not tell you exactly and explicitly what was bothering me. I could laboriously hash out every emotion directed towards each appropriate person…but the root of my unsettled-ness I could not pinpoint. Among all of the possible reasons there was a certain someone who is very dear to my heart that I needed to have a conversation with. The only problem was…I didn’t know what to say. It was painfully obvious to all those around me that something was going on, but I was again, unable to explain what needed to be said. For at least a month now I have been praying continuously for God to create the opportunity for said serious (and scary?) conversation. I asked that He place the desire in both of our hearts to be open and honest about some things. I prayed that I would have the words to verbalize my internal chaos. I asked that God create a “safe space” so that we each felt able to talk…without the emotional intensity I so often carry into important conversations.

Well…Monday night…the conversation and opportunity arose. I had already come to grips with the fact that any serious conversation would not be taking place for quite some time, but yet there it was. It’s origin was in a single question…a question that did not come from my own curiosity. A question I have not even thought about asking in at least 12 months. A question that was given to me to begin a healing conversation. S0 there it was…the seed of a conversation that blossomed into more than I could have dreamed of. I was able to put words to things I couldn’t even strain out in my own head. I did not freak out like the (mostly) crazy person I am. We were both (as one of my friends says) “totally legit…real” with one another. I don’t think I have ever felt as vulnerably safe in any situation before. I felt safe to lay it all out on the line…as did the other person. It was beautiful. I wanted to cry. But crying seemed too predictable for me. It seemed to normal for me…and this, my friends, was anything but normal. This was God-ordained. God-breathed. I would have never been able to have this specific conversation on my own. And how incredibly thankful I was (and am) to have the help.

I was blown away… Wow, my Father, Wow. You were there. Right where You said You would be. Right by my side. Holding our hands. Calming my anxious heart. Opening both our hearts. You were there catching the escaped tears. You were there piecing the thoughts together to form painful truths. You were there. In the moment. Your presence is overwhelming. Your grace undeserving. Your love…all-consuming.

Lesson #3 I will tell you…but the story that goes along with it I am going to save. Suffice it to say that it deserves it’s own post. (And this one has already become dangerously lengthy.) So lesson number three my Father taught me Monday…and this week in general…

Lesson #3: Human nature is scary, but the fruit of the Spirit is a beautiful gift.

That’s all for tonight.

xxxoo

*Leo is not this man’s real name. It was changed to protect his sacred life story.