getting out of your own way

There is a line in the movie Hitch…

(you know, 2005, Will Smith, horribly misunderstood matchmaker, in raving Rom Com? If you remember nothing else you will certainly remember character Albert, Kevin James, showing off his dance moves doing “The Q-Tip” and “Making Pizza” all the while Will Smith, Hitch, is trying not to laugh his face off? Ok–at this point–if you have no idea what I am talking about, do yourself a favor and go to Amazon, buy the movie now, and watch, enjoy, and laugh a little [or a lot. Probably a lot.]),

…I believe this one line though is incredibly profound and it has been ringing in my head all week.

…Hitch is a match maker of sorts who helps men essentially be better at dating and getting the women they love. Until he gets caught and is reported to be a monster who gets women into bed with men they would have otherwise paid no attention. 

In a climatic scene, where Hitch is in the middle of confronting the woman that he (accidentally) fell for. She screams at him, “You trick women into…” and he interrupts with,

“into getting out of their own way…”

He goes on to say he does this so that guys who culture does not cater to: the incredibly adorable, quiet guy, the shy nerd, the respectful, moderately good-looking, number cruncher, the incredibly successful stockbroker who prefers nights in to nights out, etc…can stand a chance with all of the beautiful women more outgoing, pushy, more boisterous men are snatching up. 

(Do you sense and introverted bias coming out? …I have no idea what you’re talking about. ;))

[K, we’re moving on from Hitch now. Aren’t you happy. If you thought that was riveting and don’t want to move on, contact www.imbd.com for more.]

Yesterday, I was trying to help the youngest boy I take care of in the afternoons with his homework. This boy has his very own, unique rhythms and has had a difficult time transitioning to his mom being gone and, thus, my being present more often. We were working on homework…actually, that is a stretch of the truth. He was eating his snack. I was sitting next to him encouraging the start of his homework when he looks at me and says–in his very mature, serious, 6-year-old voice–

“Will you just leave me be?”

Not kidding. Exact words. Verbatim.

I had to work hard not to laugh (or maybe I did) or scoff at the directness of such a request.

His mom is a rockstar, seriously, this woman is amazing. The acute attention she pays in understanding her three, very different boys, is unbelievable. They all have their own way that calls for a different parenting way. I haven’t quite mastered the art yet, Shocker.

So after I got over the shock of being put in my place by a six year old, I let the request sink in.

I didn’t want to let him be. We had things to do and tasks that needed to get done and I had an agenda, dangit.

But as I sat there and watched him do his thing (read: he ate a little more of his snack and when I got up to go check on something on the stove, he got up out of his stool, found the markers, and began his homework without any further prompting from myself), I realized… 

He just needed me out of his way. He needed to be allowed to do things in his own time.

Isn’t that hard to do sometimes though? To get out of our own way? We place expectations, boxes, and check marks to things and think that our plan is now the manual for control on life. 

Got a plan? Got control.

Which is a big, fat, stinking lie.

I’ve been spending a lot of time reflecting on those darn, wandering Israelites a lot lately and recently I read this:

“In the desert there were no great cities to build, no great battles to win–just God and his people….The desert was intended by God to be life beyond achievement. It was to be a life of love.”

The Israelites–once they sort of wrapped their heads around the fact that they were leaving Egypt and going to the promise land, I can only imagine that they were a bit bumfuzzled about the fact that when they stepped out of the Red Sea and went in the wrong direction–the indirect route to the promise land–their way, their plans, and their expectations were thrown a little. (They certainly whined, rebelled, and complained as though they were.)

So I wonder, maybe God is a really awesome, unfathomably greater, bigger form of Hitch?

Think I’m crazy? Did you laugh out loud? …I did. And the thought came from my brain, but maybe there is truth. 

Maybe, just maybe, God knows the journey ahead, He knows our tendencies, our bad habits, our weak spots, the lies we believe, our comforts, and our strengths and just when we lay out the best plan–even when we believe it’s according to His call on our life–He says, 

“Nope, let’s get you out of your own way. I want you to know a life of love. A life beyond achievement and tasks and accomplishments. A life that is founded and can be good (content, joyful, secure, without worry or fear) with just space, time, and You and me, kid. So let’s walk the long way.”

I argue, yes. 

Maybe you need to just let some things be today…

…simply enjoy the time and space God has given you… 

And walk the long way with Him.